"Paz" bragged about the caper at length on a long Facebook note, "I crashed Paris Hilton's Birthday Party and Accidentally the Whole Cake."
"I woke up this morning with a birthday cake in my living room," wrote Paz. "It's big. It's red. It says 'Paris'. And its f***ing delicious."
(According to his Facebook page, Paz is a Hollywood-based musician and a Yale University grad, who cites Tim McGraw, Kanye West and "Hollywood's most influential promoters" among his fans.)
As Paz explained, a well-connected pal named "Kevin" helped him sneak into Hilton's VIP bash. After "drinking heavily" at the six open bars and watching Hilton blow out the candles on her cake, Paz noticed "not a slice of frosted deliciousness has been served."
After conspiring with "Kevin" to steal the treat, Paz says he tricked the party's head of security and rushed the 70-pound cake into his pal's Nissan Maxima.
"I don't know WTF I'm going to do with it," Paz writes. "It is very unfortunate that someone stole the cake from Paris' birthday party," said Jared Gurfein, CEO of Viridian Spirits (which makes Lucid absinthe, a key ingredient in the cake's batter) in a statement. "We had the cake designed especially for Paris with Lucid in the batter and a beautiful representation of Lucid's artwork on it, which she had requested to meet the Moulin Rouge theme of the party."
Hilton's rep could not be reached for comment on the theft.