I Guess Charlie Sheen Belives in Miracles, The Easter Bunny, Snowballs Do Have A Chance In Hell, and Unicorns

Charlie Sheen not only says he'd gladly do another season of "Two and Half Men" and he'd also work with his boss Chuck Lorre again ... you know, the guy he called a "turd" and challenged to a fight.

Charlie -- who's under contract for one more season of "Men"says he'd definitely do season 9 as planned because, simply, he's a man of his word. But it gets better, Charlie says he's even on board to do a season 10 if they paid him $3 million an episode plus a $20 million signing bonus. Charlie says he'd use the bonus to cover everything the "Men" staff lost after the current season was derailed. Wow, are we sure Charlies drug test were clean.

BREAKING NEWS: CBS Pulls Production On Sheen's 'Two And A Half Men' For Remainder Of Season Following Actor's Radio Rant

CBS has pulled the plug on "Two and a Half Men"... for now.

Just hours after Charlie Sheen went on a radio rampage, blasting his bosses at the television show, CBS issued a statement on behalf of the network and "...Men's" production company, announcing they were pulling the show from production of new episodes.


"Based on the totality of Charlie Sheen's statements, conduct and condition, CBS and Warner Bros. Television have decided to discontinue production of 'Two and a Half Men' for the remainder of the season," CBS said in a statement late Thursday night.

As previously reported on AccessHollywood.com, Sheen called into a nationally syndicated radio show on Thursday and unleashed a shocking rant in which he attacked Alcoholics Anonymous and his hit CBS show.

"I was told if I went on the attack, they would cancel the show and all that and so I'm just sort of seeing if they're telling the truth or not," Charlie claimed to host Alex Jones in an interview for his radio show, "The Alex Jones Show," on Thursday, referring to his CBS bosses.

"Are they happy with the $5 billion they already made off me or do they think they can turn it into $10 [billion] in a couple more seasons?" Charlie continued. "I'm just saying, you know [the show] is a runaway freakin' juggernaut."

Charlie made it abundantly clear he doesn't believe the show can survive without him, telling Alex, "Watch your ratings, dudes. Watch your stupid ratings.

"Do what you've gotta do -- I'll go make movies with superstars and not work with idiots," he threatened.The 45-year-old also blasted show creator Chuck Lorre, calling him a "turd" while claiming that he embarrassed Chuck "in front of his children and the world by healing at a pace that his un-evolved mind cannot process."

The Man Whore of the Century (Charlie Sheen) gets a Porn to Spoof him!

Man Whore of the Century (Charlie Sheen) gets a porn to spoof him, but is it life imitating art, or just a documentary? Well those guys at X-Play who started all this "porn spoofing" craze, (Britney Rears, Not the Bradys XXX, Not Bewitched XXX, Not Cosbys XXX...is there anything sacred?) Now they have spoofed our beloved 2 1/2 Men Star Charlie Sheen in "Not Charlie Sheem's House of Whores XXX", staring many of his industry "Ho's" A year ago, porn studios were rushing out Tiger Woods exploitation flicks featuring his pornstar conquests. Now they’re rushing out Charlie Sheen exploitation flicks featuring his pornstar conquests.

Director Will Ryder and Porn Company Digital Sin team up for Not Charlie Sheen’s House of Whores XXX, starring Bree Olson, Melanie Rios, Kacey Jordan, Capri Anderson, Gigi Rivera, Tanner Mayes, Jenna Presley and Chloe Jones.

We’re guessing this title will recycle old scenes featuring Charlie Sheen’s party pals, perhaps framed by some new material shot by Will Ryder. Chloe Jones died a few years back, so her performance will definitely be archival (or will it...Buhwahahaha.)